Today, I’m basically here to vent on a subject that I am very passionate about.
Tell me something, when did this getting married thing become such a phenomenon? And ironically enough, when the heck did the “D” word become such a phenomenon?
As Brian and I approach marriage, I’ve done a whole heck of a lot of preparation in my heart to become the wife that the Lord has called me to be. I’ve read passages in scripture about marriage, and really, truly studied them. We’ve attended pre-marital counseling, will finish our last sessions up soon, and I’ve really just talked with other Godly couples and have been given advice. I know we’ll never be perfectly prepared for marriage, not saying that at all. But, we as a couple are choosing to put God first, and seek His guidance and His presence through out our marriage. Isn’t that what everyone who says, “I do” is supposed to do? Put God first? These days, that’s very uncommon.
It makes me so sick to see how many marriages are falling apart these days. I’ve heard and read that marriage is the hardest thing we’ll ever go through, but why have so many people just given up? Just taken the easy way out?
I don’t understand, and I have no tolerance for it. It shows immaturity more than anything, and it’s rather ridiculous.
Marriage is not the new dating. Divorce is not the new dating break up. A ring on the finger is not the new, “I love you.”
People. Please, before you put that ring on your finger, do some prepping with your heart. Read what scripture says about marriage. Apply it. Study it, and pray for your marriage to be that of what God designed it to be.
Marriage takes a lot of prayer and preparation. Why do so many people just put a ring on their finger, tell people they’re engaged, and it’s like that’s it? No preparation spiritually goes in to it at all.
I see all kinds of people that I know personally on my Facebook/Twitter/Instagram newsfeeds getting engaged, and quietly I think to myself, “Really? There is no way that they’ve put much thought in to that decision.” Not that I’m in a position to judge, but let’s be honest, it doesn’t take much sense to see that a couple isn’t putting Christ first.
It’s not a lust thing. You don’t get married to finally have sex with your significant other.
It’s not just the next step of dating. You don’t get married to go to the next step in your relationship.
Marriage is a strong commitment, and I wish people really knew how strong of a commitment it really is.
Just being engaged is so tough.
We are making all sorts of decisions that we’ve never had to make, and so many things are thrown at us already that we’ve had to overcome. But, we do it together.
We started renting a house, and with just Brian living in it for now, we’ve both realized that it was too small. We are now in the process of moving to our second home and we haven’t even gotten hitched yet! How nuts. We’ve joined banking accounts, we’ve made a detailed budget spreadsheet, and are doing really well at following it (surprisingly). We’ve had to not buy things one week, and wait until the next paycheck- and let me tell ya, that in itself is tough.
All of the pressure of planning a wedding also really takes a toll on your relationship, and it really has the possibility of pulling you further away from your soon-to-be spouse rather than pulling the two of you together, if you don’t handle it right. Brian and I ask for each other’s forgiveness on a daily, if not multiple times a day, basis. If we don’t do that, we’d never make it to our big day.
But, in the middle of all of the craziness, we’ve put the Lord first.
That’s all it takes to make it work.
So why do so many people find themselves failing at it?
I wish they’d take the stick out of their butt, put the pride and selfishness away, and really, truthfully follow after God.
Make sure before you put a ring on it, that you are supposed to be putting a ring on it. Make sure that you are doing everything you can to prepare your own heart for the next big step you’re planning on taking once engaged to be married.
Remember how special marriage is supposed to be, and honor that. Don’t take the gift of marriage for granted. Here we sit, so excitedly awaiting marriage and a whole life together, and people everyday are taking themselves out of that commitment to each other. It’s supposed to be a beautiful blessing. God created woman to be man’s helper throughout life, throughout marriage. Sex is supposed to be saved for marriage to make marriage that much more special. Marriage is supposed to reflect Christ, not each other. When you try and break up a marriage, how is that reflecting Christ?
Sorry for how bluntly I’ve written this afternoon. I’m not sorry I wrote it, nor am I sorry that I feel that way. I’m just sorry if I offended anyone, then again, maybe you should have been offended.
Okay, okay. I’m done!